My ex is a master at manipulation.

He is also a pathological liar so it is very hard to know what is the truth when talking to him.

Last weekend was the second weekend of the month and I had made plans to go to a Nerium AD convention. I had already entered the address into my gps and planned my whole day around the convention.

I am currently the noncustodial parent of my son so according to court records I have the privilege of visitation with him on the 1st, 3rd and 5th weekends.

That is unless there is a problem with his behavior and then I get him because his narcissistic custodial parent (more commonly referred to as my ex) has no control over his temper.

I am the “safe” parent as most of us who made the mistake of marrying a narcissist are.

Well, while preparing for the convention I got a text message from my ex stating that this was my weekend to have my son.

I responded that the court documents and current law stated that I had him the 1st, 3rd and 5th weekends.

He said, “No, it was every other weekend.” My ex has the common delusion that he is the judge and has the ability to rewrite court decrees on a whim.

He said my son and I had discussed this already and when I thought about it I realized we had.  My son had told me that I could go to the convention and he would just hang out at my house.

There was a problem with this though.

I had plans to take him out of town  on the 3rd weekend for a reunion. I was hoping if I took him on the 2nd weekend that wouldn’t mess up the trip we had planned.

Then my ex came clean.

He said he and his wife wanted to go out of town on the fourth weekend and he wanted my son to be with me that weekend. Well, that is why he was trying to change the court decree. I understand now. Him and his third wife wanted to go on one of their many vacations.

However, in the light of my love for my son this was all good. I could see him more! All right, I know I am doing the happy dance because I truly love spending time with my kids more than most things I do.

So what did I do with the problem that my ex had created?

I evaluated the situation and decided not to go to the convention.

Nerium AD is an awesome company who sponsor many conventions for their partners and it was not going to be the only convention that they held.

They are also such a great company that I only had to eat $20 for this convention. If it would have cost a lot I may have been angry at the situation.

Nerium’s motto is to give back and they do give back to their partners in so many ways. Because of their business philosophy I was able to respond with kindness instead of anger. Now that is some kind of awesome gift from a company.

I wasn’t done yet though there was one more thing I had to do.

Today I sent my ex the following text message…”Hey I just want you to know that any time you want me to take care of my son I am willing to do that. I  enjoy him and appreciate you encouraging him to stay with me. I love him so much.”

That… my dear readers, is the definition of heaping coals of fire upon your enemy’s head.

God scores a major win!