I have a dear friend who is a wonderful Christian and she is married to an unbeliever. He is not a bad man in any way. He is a wonderful husband and a terrific father to their child and their grandchildren. Yet she yearns to have fellowship with him in her Christian walk. This is commonly referred to as being unequally yoked. There are times she has been tempted to leave but the Lord has sustained her in this marriage.
She has sought me for advice. I knew that this was addressed in the Bible so I sought God’s Word for my counsel. In I Corinthians 7:12-16 the Word of God states: (12)”But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. (13) And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him.(14)For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. (15) But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. (16) For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?”(New King James Version)
What could this mean? Does an unbeliever achieve sanctification through the faith of their spouse? When you understand the concept of marriage through God’s eyes you must understand that when two people are married they become one to God. If an unbeliever marries a believer, when God sees them, His eyes must look through the salvation that the believer has before he looks at the sin of the unbeliever. The believer is in essence a covering for the unbeliever and may cause mercy to rain down where judgement would otherwise strike.
The children are considered holy because the believer is there to lead the children down the right path. Without the believer in the midst the children would be doomed to find their own way into God’s kingdom.
Yet I knew there was more in the Bible. I had read a verse about how a woman should respond in this situation. I mean if a believer is married to someone who does not know Christ should she not be preaching to this man twenty-four times seven?
That would be the way we as humans would think but the Word of God reveals a different path. In 1 Peter 3:1 the Word of God says: “(1) In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over (2) by observing your pure and reverent lives.”
I find it interesting that God gives the unbeliever an out to marriage but holds the believer to a higher standard. They are to remain married for the benefit of their spouse and as well as successive generations. I am so grateful to God that he has given my friend wisdom to hold true to His word even before she became aware of the truth.
