IS TINDER TENDER?

I never met the man. His picture on Tinder was interesting, not really handsome, just interesting. I am intrigued by interesting, so when we were a match on Tinder I decided to give him a chance.

It started with a message on Tinder. He had asked me out to dinner and I had accepted. The first time he called me I felt as if I was going through an inquisition.

The questions were thrown at me with velocity, almost as if anger were the driving force.

“What do you do for a living?” I replied that I worked in home health.

“Which church do you go to?”

“Well I used to go to Gateway but now I go to a neighborhood church that is much smaller. I like the smaller aspect of this church.”

“Are you a night owl?”

“Well, sometimes I stay up late but not always.”

He interrupted rudely. “This is a yes or no question. Are you or aren’t you a night owl?”

“I would say I can be a night owl on most nights.”

He replied with firmness in his tone. “I can stay up till one or two in the morning and then get up at five am and go to work and if I go to bed at ten pm then I wake up at three am. I don’t need sleep.”

I was tempted to say that he may need sleep more than he suspected because he was just a more rude than most chaps… but I held my tongue in check.

He asked me out to dinner the next night. It was a Monday night. Monday nights are my Bible Study nights and for the record I love hanging out with my group of friends as we study the Bible. I find that the comfort I receive from that family of God far supersedes any fun or excitement I have on most dates.

So we made arrangements to have dinner together on Tuesday night. He said he would call me when he was done with work.

I didn’t give it much thought on Tuesday. I noticed I had a voicemail at about 7-8 that evening and instead of listening to it, I just called him back.

He started to tell me what he had done all evening, as if we were old friends and this was a common occurrence. In the conversation he mentioned that he had already had dinner. Then he said “You can come over to watch television with me on my couch.”

Really?!!! Wow! This guy lives clear across town from me, it was dark, I never drive in the dark and he wanted me to watch TV with him. Golly Gee, how exciting! NOT!!!

I rarely watch TV at all. In fact the most glorious week of my life was last summer in the Dominican Republic where there was no TV and I was privileged to engage in meaningful conversation with my son.

The really hilarious aspect of this conversation was that his tone of voice suggested that watching TV was a magnificent way to spend the evening.

I paused for just a second then decided I may as well burst this guy’s bubble sooner rather than later. “Well, right now I am walking and when I get done doing that I will be going back to work. Most evenings I am documenting on my computer in my home and I never watch TV. I usually work most evenings because that is what my job requires me to do. (I didn’t mention to him that I have most weekends free because I don’t intend to waste them sitting on someone’s couch watching other people live their lives on a stupid black box.)

His response stunned me. “Well, then why are you wasting my time? Why are you even online? You are just wasting everyone’s time. You should take your profile down!” He was really angry and he hung up on me.

I heard a faint knock on my heart saying. “You know he meant to hurt you. You should cry a few tears at least. You really do work a lot of hours and it does make it very difficult for you to invest time in a relationship.”

The knock was the devil trying to get into the locked room of broken dreams and heartache. A room I have locked with Faith and Hope that God is in control and He will keep my heart within His hands until the man I am to marry finally meets me.

I kept walking and then busted out in laughter instead of tears. This man was merely not the one for me. I was so thankful that he had been honest and truthful right up front instead of wasting my time with manipulation. I hope he finds someone who really enjoys watching television with him but it wasn’t going to be me because as soon as I got home I was going back to work.

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