I am a different kind of girlfriend. That may be why I have not landed a mate yet.

Whenever I go on dates I analyze the person I meet and try to figure out exactly what God needs me to do in the relationship.

One thing He doesn’t need me to do is to take my clothes off. The other thing I refuse to do is demean or devalue the last girlfriend or wife that the man is trying to get over. I try not to open up the door to being a psychoanalyst but sometimes these men just are so in need of some Christian counseling that I want to give them the business cards of my friends who are in that business.

I also do not pick up the tab. I expect the man that I marry to be in a position where he can pay the bills and whatever I make will be the added blessing. To pay the tab on a date is to put on a front that I am not willing to continue in marriage.

Lately I have dated two men who are still in love with their former wives. They are both attracted to my looks and my figure but I am standing true to God’s principles for dating and I have resisted any physical involvement.

Although one of them is going through the process of divorce and the other one is fresh out of a divorce I feel that crossing the line into intimacy would not only be fornication but also adultery. It would be messing with their heart when their heart had not healed yet. Who knows what the fall out would be for my heart.

This morning I had to keep standing my ground with the latest man. He finally backed down. I will continue to see him because for a change he builds me up and is very encouraging to me. I am usually the one who is constantly doing that and it is nice to have someone return the favor.

I find that when the physical intimacy barrier is crossed without having the heart healed and the proper commitment in place it does so much harm to both people. If marriage is in the future for them there will be plenty of time for intimacy when that happens. If it is not in the future then they shouldn’t be doing it in the first place anyway.

Sex is more than just a feeling and/or a possible orgasm. It should be an expression of love and it is important that it honors God who is the origin of love.

I had a man recently  tell me if I wanted to wait until marriage for sex I was not going to get many dates. That hasn’t been the case. I still date frequently but I do so with Jesus’ sacrifice and God’s mandates first and foremost in my mind.

If I want to attract the man that God has for me then why would I choose to walk down Satan’s path to get him?