I have had quite a wonderful experience since I have been single dating a lot of kind and successful men. I have also had the unfortunate experience of dating more than a few men who have not rendered a second date.

The latest man I met has caused me to reflect in a deeper way how I choose conversational topics. Usually the conversation gets steered to the reasons why they are single. I have heard more about ex-wives than sports teams and if they don’t have ex-wives it is the ex-girlfriends I have heard about.

I don’t mind them talking about their past loves but it is no foundation upon which to build a relationship.

My recent man of interest talked to me a bit about his marriage and admitted he had sinned in the relationship. Of course like most men he blamed the ex-wife. That game has been played since day one with Adam and Eve. We all play the blame game. I have done so too.

I have prayed and contemplated whether or not I wanted to dig deeper in that bowl of sin. I am someone who can analyze a person down to their most microscopic cell and I can nail them to the cross with condemnation or understanding.

As I prayed about it I realized it would do nothing for this man for him to confess his sin to me.

I am not his savior. I do not know his heart. Only God does. It is not for me to forgive him. It is for God and his ex-wife.

It is my duty to gently encourage him and edify him in the good qualities I see in him and those are very many; much more than I have seen in most men.

It is also my privilege to intercede for him in prayer, hoping that he will draw close to God and seek Him, not me, for forgiveness and healing of the heart.

I already see God opening places in his heart which were locked for many years. It is not my place to grab the key from God and to try to unlock his heart. For if I do, I risk those doors to his heart being locked forever.

If I choose to play God I am choosing the wrong role to play, for my blood saves no one from their si.