I was eleven years old when my life changed dramatically. I had always been a healthy child full of life and joy. Then one summer day I got a horrible headache. I remember my mother being gone in the evening. I think she had to help out at church with a wedding. She told me to stay inside but I didn’t, I went out to the barn to hang out with my cats. The barn was a favorite refuge for me in that time of my life and it seemed to lessen the pain of the excruciating headache.
That was the last thing I remember doing before I went into a coma. I had contracted Viral Encephalitis and was in a coma for six weeks. The doctors didn’t expect me to live. Then they said if I did live I would be a vegetable. My mother did not listen to them nor believe them. She maintained faith that I would be healed.
After spending two months in a hospital I came out in a wheelchair. Quite a different reality from what I had been before I went into the hospital. My mother drove me to a nearby town for physical therapy. I hated it even though I loved the therapists. My mother encouraged me not to try to walk because she was scared I would break a leg. I find it amusing that she thought God would only heal my mind but not heal my legs. One day I remember waking up from a nap and looking at my wheelchair at the end of my bed. I said,”This is ridiculous, I am going to get up and walk.” I got out of bed, pushing the wheelchair aside and walked out into our living room. My mother almost had a heart attack when she saw me walking. lol
Reclaiming my health was the easy part of being healed. After that illness I was bullied horribly. It was such a difficult behavior for me to understand. I didn’t have one cell in my body which was capable of that kind of evil. I had always been the one to step in and stop others from being bullies. I had a lot of questions for God during this time but the main question was, “Why me?”
During the age when most kids are thinking about who they are going to date, or which party they will attend I had no invitations to either. I was strikingly beautiful and fairly intelligent but I was considered “weird” by my peers. I became a track star and the only friends I had were kids from other towns which I would meet at track meets.
Since I didn’t have any friends I turned to God. I spent many a lonely night with Him. Searching his word and memorizing scripture. I developed an awareness of Him which has blossomed into a beautiful and fragrant meadow within my heart and mind.
I knew there was no way I was going to stay in the town where I had been bullied. I did well in high school and went to college on a track scholarship. My mother forced me to stay close to home even though I wanted to go to Oregon to be by my cousins. I got my degree and got married then left the state as soon as I could. I didn’t want to be close to the origin of so much pain.
I rarely go back home due to several reasons but I do still have questions for God. Why did He allow such harm to come to me through the wickedness of others? Why didn’t He visit that disease on one of the kids who deserved it, instead of me?
The only answer I have come up with is that I was meant for so much more than that little farm town could ever envision. If I had been popular I may have not gone to college. I certainly wouldn’t have achieved the two degrees that I have now. I may have married a young man from that town and been forced to live there for the rest of my life. I doubt that I would have started this blog or even become aware of the talent that God has given me as a writer. Bullies forced me to escape from the simpleness of their existence. I thank God every time I do go home that that is not the place I live.
But it is more than this. I think that I was set apart by God because He has a work to do through me. In Mark 6:4 the Word of God says:”Then Jesus told them, “A prophet is honored everywhere except in his own hometown and among his relatives and his own family.” (NLT)
So if you feel out of place in your family and are being bullied at school, take heart, you may be destined for much greater things.
Wow Gracie!! You have been through so much and have overcome every step of the way! I totally understand about the bullying in a small town and leaving that area that caused you so much pain. All that you wrote about that could be my story. I had to escape too and hate to even go back to that area to visit. And I can tell you that you are so right. I have found that God isolates those that He calls to fulfill a a certain purpose. If we were so happy in our situations, we would never reach for Him. God bless you, my sweet sister!!
It is amazing to me how similar our paths have been. Reading your book was such a revelation to me because I finally realized that my one and only marriage had been abusive. Because of the verbal and psychological abuse I had encountered as a child I had not considered it abusive. I thought it was normal. I realize now that my divorce was a release not only from my husband but also the abuse of my childhood. I no longer tolerate abuse or manipulation of any kind in a relationship. I would rather be alone than date the devil or even worse consider marrying someone who is abusive or manipulative. To God be the glory for my overcoming. There is no way I could have done it without Him! He is so loving and so protective of me and I know He is the same for you. I love you so much my sweet Sister in Christ!