My mother has spent countless hours in her garden. She used to have our house littered with house plants. Many times she would not go on trips because she did not want to leave her plants. I frankly thought she was a little nuts in the gardening department.

She encouraged me to start gardening when I moved down to Texas. I told her “Absolutely not! I was not going to get my fingers that dirty. After all, I was a nurse and hygiene is important to a nurse.”

Then I got a divorce.

After my divorce I redecorated my son’s bedroom. I used to change the decor in my house for every season. It was such a fun house to decorate but it needed more. I needed to do something in the back yard…. So I started planting flowers. A patient of mine had given me a beautiful plum-tree and my husband had planted a live oak in the back yard, so I had to learn how to work with shade loving plants and work it I did.

My backyard was amazing at my old house. I didn’t garden just for the aesthetic effect though. One of the main reasons why I gardened was to have a common connection with my mother. Something which she could take credit for and be proud of me for doing.

I have texted her numerous pictures of my beautiful flowers and have spent long, hot, sweaty days baking in the sun tending the “connection to my mother”.

As I have gardened I have gained knowledge. There have been plenty of plants that have died from my lack of knowledge so I try my hardest to learn about a plant before I take the step of putting it into soil. Many times I throw out my nuggets of wisdom to other unsuspecting gardeners at Lowe’s or Calloway’s. The other gardeners are always thankful for the knowledge that I have gained.

There has been an unsuspecting benefit of my work to find a common thread with my mother. I now have learned that the same thread that binds me to my mother, can also bind me to other women who love to garden. All of my close confidants love to garden. We are not yet at the point where we are sharing roots but I can feel that is coming soon in some of my friendships.

As a writer it is at times difficult for me to spend days on end pulling weeds. I would rather write. I remember reading an interview about Nora Roberts and they asked her how she could write so many books. Her answer was,”Well, I don’t garden.” How funny!

So my solution to that predicament is to hire out some of the weeding. That way I can have both my writing and my gardening but more importantly I have a connection to other women. That connection brings me so much joy because it has paved the road for a friendship with my mother as well as other women.

What a gift my mother has given me…