I have something to say to you and I hope you listen this time.

IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

If you are a child  and you are slapped, beaten, belted or demeaned for being a child, it is not your fault. Childhood is a time in a person’s life which is supposed to be fun and lighthearted. It is a time when we should  not only be allowed to make mistakes, they should be expected.

Disobedience and rebellion is not good. If you are a child it is important to try to obey but if it is hard for you to obey your parents they should not take their anger out on you.

When my children disobeyed me I would have consequences but I would always leave a door open to negotiations to work out of the consequence.

There is no negotiating in a black eye, a bruised wrist, a broken bone. There is only rage in that.

If an adult is touching you in areas that are private and areas which they should not touch, it is not because you looked at them a certain way or because you dressed a certain way. They are sick and wrong to touch you in those places.

As you grow up if your parents are constantly screaming at you saying that you do nothing right they need to look in the mirror. If they are screaming it is because they do not know how to control themselves. People who do not know how to control themselves  try to control others.

If you are dating someone and they force you to have sex against your wishes that is rape. It is considered a crime. You need to report it as rape. It does not matter if you were drinking or dancing in a certain manner what matters is that you said “No,” and they did not respect that.

Abusers commonly blame everything on the victims of their abuse. They are manipulative, cunning and controlling. Their anger and control issues our not our fault but if we stay in a relationship which has tendrils of control and abuse wrapped around it, it is our fault for not escaping the abuse. 

The hotline for child abuse is 1-800=4-A-CHILD.

Domestic abuse hotline is 1-800-799-7233.